Reconnecting after being in a long-distance relationship comes with its share of challenges. here’s how to navigate the tricky terrain
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Meeting your partner for the first time in person after being in a long-distance relationship releases a cocktail of emotions, from anxiety to excitement, nervousness and even fear, While the excitement of seeing your partner outside the bounds of a phone screen could trump the nerves there’s no denying that the first meeting could be awkward and tense. In due course, one may experience never-heard-before challenges and witness an unexplored side of their partners that may put them in a fix. But, with a few expert-approved tips, navigating through teething problems while rekindling your romance becomes a lot easier.
Technological aids might have bridged the distance gap while communicating with our loved ones, but they fail to compensate for the warmth of them being in front of us physically. Mumbai-based dating coach and relationship educator Pratik Jain believes that the primary reason why people feel disconnected while meeting for the first time after being in a long-distance relationship is that they are not fully aware of their partner’s mannerisms. “The little interaction that both the partners have between themselves via video calls, texts or messages, they form an image in their minds about their partners, their taste preferences and their overall personality. The disconnect happens when they find that the image they have in their minds does not coincide with reality.”
While the ghost of anxiety, nervousness and the baggage of your long-distance relationship may arise while trying to rework your relationship navigating through these teething problems is not as tough as it seems.
To make the process seamless, here are a few expert-recommended tips to keep in mind while reworking your relationship in a new setting…
Meeting your partner after so long can release boisterous butterflies in your stomach. The burden of casting the ‘unforgettable first impression’ may seem daunting and put a wrench in your plans of reconnecting. Delhi-based psychotherapist and relationship expert Dr Meenakshi Atawnia suggests discussing pointers before the two partners meet like the venue of the meeting (private or public space), and the extent of physical intimacy that both partners are open to.“Rather than planning big romantic gestures, one should start with baby steps. One must enjoy every moment of their partner’s company. Slowly, then you can start with small actions like writing love notes, holding hands and then proceed towards physical or sexual intimacy”.
Just like having a road map helps a person navigate the journey easily, being clear about each other’s expectations for the relationship lessens the chance of misunderstandings. Dating coach Pratik Jain says,” Apart from being transparent and clear about one’s expectations, one should also question individualistic expectations from a realistic lens to form new opinions, dissolve older ones and have better clarity about the future course of the relationship”.
Obsessing and thinking about the worst-case scenario will trigger anxiety and pave the way for miscommunication, misunderstandings and doubts to creep in According to Dr Meenakshi Atawnia, the thought of counteracting the unseen can sometimes create worry, generate panic and lead to unexpected outbursts that may spoil the organic nature of the relationship over time.
Understandably, some misunderstandings and insecurities might make home in your relationship, especially when there’s the mountain of long-distance to traverse. While trying to rework the relationship, they may end up addressing unresolved conflicts during their long-distance association that may aggravate problems of the present-day scenario. Dr Meenakshi Atawnia advises bringing about unresolved conflicts while discussing complaints in the present-day scenario of your relationship rather than avoiding or ignoring the topic to maintain peace, she says, “People need not completely avoid addressing things that have been left unspoken in their long-distance relationship, they can bring it up when they come across a similar situation or talk about it when they are discussing how they have evolved during their relationship rather than burying it completely”.
In an attempt to compensate for the time lost together, couples usually fail to establish a difference between ‘me time’ and ‘us time’, both of which are integral for any relationship. Not taking care of this can cause unnecessary angst and miscommunication. While spending time together after being apart for a long time is important, it’s important to give each other space and time.
Whether it’s a regular relationship or a long-distance one, the most important thing to remember is to communicate and be clear about your expectations from the relationship.
Neha Karra is a junior writer, who loves to discover and try the latest trends in style, food and beauty. When she is not curating articles, you will find her playing with kids, reading books, painting and practising Mandala Art. View Profile