How is A Malayalam Christian Wedding Different From A Konkan One?

Actor Keerthy Suresh recently married her longtime beau Anthony Thattil in a beautiful ceremony in Goa. The couple solemnised their wedding based on traditional Iyengar and Catholic Christian ceremonies.

After sharing the photos from the Iyengar ceremony, the actress took to Instagram to share a glimpse of what went down at the Christian wedding too.

The bride looked stunning in her white Zuhair Murad gown as she walked down the aisle with her father by her side. In the photographs, the couple can be seen having a blast with their family, friends, and pet dog Nyke at the ceremony.

While the white wedding looked very similar to the ones some of us have seen growing up in movies and TV shows, some rituals and traditions distinguish a Malayalam Catholic wedding from a Konkan Catholic one.

History, Roots and Evolution of Kerala Catholic and Goan Catholic Wedding Rituals

According to the the gospel of St. Thomas, the origin of Christianity in Kerala can be traced to AD 52 when St Thomas arrived on the coast of Muziris and established seven churches in the districts of Kodungallur, Palayoor, Kottakkavu, Kokkamangalam, Niranam, Nilackal, and Kollam. Since then the wedding ceremonies have tweaked their traditions and implemented an element of Hindu ceremonies. While the catholic weddings in Kerala have their roots in Rome, the Konkani Catholic wedding ceremonies and rituals are influenced by Portuguese culture.

As time passed by, both Catholic communities evolved, incorporating elements from indigenous cultures in their wedding ceremonies to emphasise the concepts of commitment, marriage and union of two souls on a spiritual, societal and physical level.

“Christian weddings in Kerala reflect a blend of traditional Hindu Malayali customs with Catholic ceremonies”, says Nandita Rao, wedding planner at Bengaluru-based wedding planning company,Tales of Tradition. “The traditional bridal outfit of the Malayali brides is usually a white saree with a golden border rather than a white western gown which shows the Indian influence.  The Malayali catholic wedding is usually dominated by the colours white, gold and green which reflects Kerala’s natural beauty and can also be found in traditional Hindu weddings in Kerala as well.”

“Anybody who wants to get an insight into Goan culture and the Portuguese influence over time should attend a Konkani Catholic wedding,” says Clarence Henriques, founder at Goa-based wedding planning company,The Perfect Knot.“The major indicator of the Portuguese influence is the Konkani Catholic wedding feast which includes dishes like Vindaloo, Sorpotel, Cafreal and Bebinca which is made the traditional Portuguese way. However, there are certain elements like the usage of coconut palms in the decor and in the ritual which is also seen in Konkani Saraswat weddings.”

Similarities between a Malayali Christian wedding and a Konkani Catholic wedding

Apart from the happy and cheerful vibe reverberated at both the weddings there are many things similar between a Malayalam Christian wedding and a Konkani Catholic one.

The elements of Hinduism

As both cultures have evolved in India over time which has a major Hindu population, you can see certain elements of Hindu wedding ceremonies carried out at both weddings.  Malayalam Christian weddings include the tying of aMinekettuaround the bride's neck to signify that the wedding has been solemnised which is very similar to theMangalsutraritual in many Hindu communities. Though Konkani Catholic weddings do not have aMangalsutraor aMinekettuthey have aSadooceremony where the bride is gifted a red saree by the mother-in-law along with a statue of baby Jesus in a trousseau, the bride is later given a similar dress by her parents when she visits her mother’s place which is again similar to thePag Phereceremony carried in many North Indian cultures.

The beginning of the wedding festivities

The Konkani and the Malayali Christian Catholic festivities kick start with the meeting of elders and the exchange of gifts and a bangle which is given to the bride by the mother-in-law. TheChuddoceremony of the Konkani Catholic weddings usually involves glass bangles of red and green colours which is given to the bride right before the engagement ceremony. The colour red symbolises passion and commitment whereas the colour green symbolizes fertility, growth and new beginnings. This ritual is also very similar to theChoodaceremony carried out in Punjab. Similarly in Malayali Christian weddings, there is a ceremony known as theAcharakalyanamwhere also the elders meet and decide on a wedding date, the finalising of the wedding date ends with the groom's mother gifting the bride a bangle which is usually a family possession and does not always have to be green or red.

The wedding rituals

The wedding rituals carried out during a Malayali Christian wedding and a Catholic wedding are very similar like the exchange of rings and vows at the church. Konkani Catholic weddings also have an exchange of rings, and vows which is usually carried out in the presence of a pastor or a qualified priest. Both weddings also include rituals like giving away the bride which is similar to theKanyadaanritual carried out in traditional Hindu marriages.

“Nowadays rather than adhering to the vows of the books, people prefer to write their own vows”, says Nandita Rao, “We recently did a Malayali Christian wedding where the groom was a catholic and the bride was an Andhra Hindu, the couple wrote their vows that were specific to their bond and defined their relationship rather than adhering to the rule book.”

Differences in a Konkani Catholic and Malayali Christian Wedding

Though we can see a lot of similarities between a Malayali Christian wedding and a Goan wedding, there are minute differences between the two that bring out their diversity.

The pre-wedding rituals

The pre-wedding rituals in a Konkan Catholic ceremony include a Roce ceremony. It is carried out at the bride and the groom's house. The word ‘Roce’ comes from the word ‘ros’ which is derived from the Sanskrit word ‘Ras’which means ‘juice’. TheRoce ceremony in a Goan catholic wedding includes the bride and the groom being anointed with coconut oil and then bathed in coconut milk to clear off all impurities of their previous life and give them a clean slate to write their life ahead. As coconut is abundantly grown in the Goan region and is a symbol of purity, and abundance and a major ingredient in Goan cuisines it is used in the Roceceremony to purify all sins of the bride and the groom.

“The Roce ceremony in a Konkani wedding is very similar to the haldi ceremony carried out in Hindu weddings,” says Clarence Hendriques, “The bride and the groom are anointed with coconut oil and then they are bathed in coconut water, which is vaguely similar to the Mangala Snanamritual of South Indian weddings. Sometimes the water also contains rose petals which are poured onto the bride and the groom. It is a delight to watch as it turns into a fun game where everyone is eagerly waiting to bathe the to-be-weds in the mixture. The family members have a lot of fun by throwing coins or cash into the milk bowls which are later given to the maids or family members who have helped in the wedding preparations.”

“One of the Roceceremonies that I was organising where the friends took entire advantage of the situation,” recalls, Tennyson Rosa, founder of Goa-based wedding planning company, Derosa Weddings. “Rocewas basically prepared only with coconut milk but at this wedding, people mixed beer, alcohol and eggs and made the entire ceremony a messy affair. It was a fun experience. Earlier it was the Konkani Catholic wedding which was the highlight of the marriage festivities but now I can say that people look forward eagerly to the Roce ceremony.”

In a Malayali Christian ceremony, a Roce ceremony is absent. A ceremony called theMadhuram Veppuis carried out where the bride and the groom are fed sweets by all the relatives just a day before their wedding and they seek blessings from the elders of their family for the life lying ahead.

Post wedding Rituals

Another major distinctive factor between Konkani Catholic ceremonies and Malayali Christian ceremonies is the Xim ceremony. TheXimceremony is carried out by the people of the Konkan region where the elders of the family draw a boundary using liquor and offer their prayers from either side. The bride and the groom's family recite prayers, resolve disagreements, shower blessings on the couple and finally conclude the wedding festivities. In a Malayali Christian wedding, the wedding festivities are concluded with the cake cutting and wine-toasting ceremony.

The Goan Bhikrea Jevonn and The Theenmura (Malayali Christian Wedding Feast)

As both states come in the southern part of the country, there are some ingredients that you can find in common between both regions. Spices like cayenne pepper, cardamom, souring agents and the usage of coconut and fish are very common in the Goan and the Kerala cuisine which is very evidently reflected in the Konkani ChristiansBhikrea Jevonnand the Malayali Christian wedding feast, the Theenmura. Another commonality between both the traditional wedding feasts is the methods of preparation like stewing, boiling, braising and roasting which is used in the preparation of many delicacies and dishes which are common to both regions like the famous Pork Vindaloo, which is also known as Viniyari in Kerala.

TheBhikrea Jevonnis a humble wedding feast which is prepared basically for the departed souls of the family members to seek their blessings before the wedding. TheTheenmuraincludes a multi-course lavish preparation that has several courses with meat and pickle preparations. Another distinctive factor between the Konkan and the Malayali wedding feast is the usage of souring agents, Konkan feasts use a lot of Kokkum in their recipes whereas Kerala cuisine uses a lot of tamarind as the souring agents. Another distinctive factor between a Goan wedding feast and a Kerala catholic wedding feast is that a Goan feast is accompanied by a Fenni whereas aTheenmurais accompanied by Toddy. Vojee also known as sweetmeats are distributed at the end of a Goan wedding which is not present during a Malayali Christian wedding feast.

“Foodies will be missing a lot if they don't attend the Theenmura”, asserts Chef Regis Matthews, “A traditional Theenmura has cake and wine as the first course, followed by a beef or a chicken cutlet served with an onion salad, called ‘salas’. A major highlight of the Theenmura is the Bormas, the wood-fired oven breads served with duck roast or beef roast. And that is served with either duck roast or chicken roast. appam. mutton stew, fish or prawn moilee. A traditional Theemnura is accompanied by beetroot pickled in vinegar.”

Now that our mini crash course on the differences and similarities between the two kinds of ceremonies is over, we’ll be over here swooning over how precious Keerthy and Anthony’s dog looked at the wedding.