What’s The Right Way To Bring Along A Plus-One To A Wedding?

Weddings are a time of joy and celebration. Both for the happy couple getting married and for the people who are a part of the momentous occasion. It’s also a time to get together with loved ones, family and friends alike. In fact, many of us consider attending a wedding with a partner, friend or in other words, a plus-one quite a milestone.

A plus-one is a person you would like to accompany you to an event, in this case, a wedding. But it doesn’t only apply to romantic relationships. An elderly family member who requires assistance, or simply a friend who you’d like to come with you to the wedding.

But, how do you take someone along to a wedding? What is the right way to do it? There are many reasons to approach this subject delicately. Being a mindful guest also means being considerate of the to-be-wedded couple’s comfort. So, follow us along as we decipher what is the most appropriate way to go about this.

Proper Plus One Etiquette For Weddings

Who can bring a plus-one?

Traditionally, the rules say that people who are married, cohabitating, or in commitments can bring plus-ones to a wedding and only when the invitation specifies that a plus-one is welcome. In 2017, theTODAYmorning show discussed wedding faux pas, and asked the same question among one another. The answer? If you’re single, no. If you’re married, yes. Five years later, a member of the audience asked the hosts of the same show if it was acceptable to ask a couple if they can bring a plus one.

According to hosts Hoda Kotb and Jenna Bush Hager, if you’re close to the to-be-married couple, then it’s alright to ask them to bring someone to the wedding. So, we did a little bit of digging of our own and askedSeema Puri, an etiquette coach and corporate trainer the same question. “If you do decide to ask the couple whether or not you can bring a plus one, you have to make sure it’s someone very close to you, someone you share a meaningful relationship with. It’s usually not appropriate to choose a random or fair-weather friend to go to the wedding with,’ she responded. Seems like we have an answer, folks.

How to ask if you can bring a plus-one along?

“Weddings can often be an intimate affair, one where couples just want their near & dear to celebrate with them or sometimes it could just be about the numbers. If you are a guest, it is not polite to take someone along uninvited,” saysRukshana Eisa, an etiquette expert.

She also goes on to explain that one shouldn’t put the couple in the awkward position of having to invite an additional guest. “Ideally, you should say that you would have loved to attend but have a close friend in town so would have to decline. This way you are not putting the couple in a tough spot by outright asking if you can bring someone along. If the couple is okay with it, they will insist that you bring your plus one and if not, they would politely accept your explanation.”

Aside from this, if you have taken the bold step to ask whether you can take a partner or friend along, there are a few things you have to keep in mind. “Encourage your date or plus-one to dress according to the occasion. And, make sure you introduce them to the couple properly in order to foster a comfortable atmosphere,” says Seema. She also mentions that it’s imperative to be considerate of the couple’s circumstances and choices.

“Weddings have guest limits and budget constraints, only bring a plus-one if it has been explicitly offered. If it has not been mentioned, you must RSVP promptly, you have to ask the host that you have someone you’d like to bring along, and you have to make sure you tell them your potential plus-one’s name. This helps the couple plan the seating and catering.”

In conclusion, it depends on how close you are to the to-be-wedded couple, and if you must ask to bring a plus-one, make sure you articulate it gracefully, try not to put the couple or bride in an awkward position to feel obligated to invite your date. And if you can take someone to the wedding, try to cultivate social ease for both the couple and their family by introducing your plus-one properly.