Diana Penty On Love, Destiny, and How to Have the Best Time at a Wedding

Diana Penty, like many of us, has a hard time understanding how Gen-Z is navigating the modern dating landscape. “I’m an old-school romantic,” she declares, early on in our conversation, “I don't even know how modern relationships work because I’ve heard so much and I've seen so much that baffles me, honestly.” She immediately clarifies that she respects everyone’s choice to date how they want. However, she likes her equations to be old-fashioned.

The model-turned-actress has been in a relationship with diamond merchant Harsh Sagar for over a decade. Diana made her relationship public late last year with a post on Instagram, calling him her “partner in life”. An outsider, or her 4.6 million odd followers on Instagram, might say that she lucked out and the Universe found her ‘The One’ in an era where ‘ghosting’ and ‘situationships’ have become the norm, but she is quick to disabuse anyone of the notion that it’s all destiny. “Many people feel destiny means just sitting at home doing nothing, and things will just happen for you,” she tells Manifest. “I believe that life throws opportunities at you, but then you have to make something of those opportunities and do something with them. Once you’ve put in your everything, then what happens is beyond your control, and I feel that’s destiny.”

When it comes to lessons in love that her relationships have taught her over the years, Diana has learnt an important one that has made her life much easier. “I think I’ve learned not to expect people to react the way I expect them to react,” she says, “My defence mechanism in relationships is to not expect anything. I don’t like to be let down, and so I refrain from expecting anything. I know that makes me sound like a…what’s that word? You know, someone who always expects the worst?” Realistic, I prompted. She laughs and says, “No, it’s something negative?” When the word continued to elude her, she asks me to move on with my questions. (“Pessimist! I was thinking of a pessimist,” Diana declares after a few minutes.)

Marriage might not be on the cards for her right now, but weddings have a huge place in her heart. “I like smaller gatherings because I’m a little introverted. It can be really fun when you’re surrounded by people you care about and just have fun,” she says, “I understand why people have big weddings because it’s based on relationships and how sometimes you have to keep everyone happy and invite the whole world! (Laughs). But, in my opinion, intimate gatherings are more meaningful.”

While she loves everything that goes behind planning and executing a sangeet ceremony (“It’s the most fun, I think. Everybody gets together and rehearses for days before the event, and it’s so much fun to be a part of the whole process.”), you’re most likely to find Diana Penty at the buffet at any wedding she is invited to. “Some weddings have damn good food, okay? And I love food, so I always go and check out the scene in advance to see what I'm going to eat tonight.” Diana then goes on to explain the problem with couples these days, not knowing when to scale back on buffet options. “When you're really hungry, you just wanna eat it all, but then you can't, because you get full and then you're in these really pretty and elaborate outfits, so you're also struggling to make sure you’re not dropping food on it and then you're trying to pick the the the options that are easiest to eat. And yet your mind is on the stuff that’s messiest because that’s usually most delicious too. So, you know, it's a struggle.”

It’s immediately evident that Diana knows a thing or two about having the best time at a wedding. So it’s not a surprise that her wedding guest style revolves around being comfortable. “A lot of wedding venues are really large, and manoeuvring them with your heavy lehengas and tall heels, especially if it’s an outdoor wedding, can be an adventure,” she says, “You have to be comfortable to be able enjoy yourself, so that you're not constantly either fidgeting with your outfit or taking off your shoes to just walk. I’ve just decided that I'm gonna wear flats. I realise that juttis are the best because then you're free of heels and your feet are not sinking into the mud and your toes aren’t hurting because you're standing on them the whole night. You can dance and you’re just free.”

The actress continues, “I love saris, but I used to find them difficult to manage. If it’s going to be a really long evening, then half my sari’s pleats would inevitably fall apart by the end of it. So I find pre-stitched saris to be a lifesaver. It just solves all the problems. It’s just like putting on a skirt, and there’s no need to make pleats or use thousands of pins!”

When asked if there’s one character from her filmography that she’d want to be a part of her bridal squad, she promptly replies with, “Happy from Happy Bhag Jayegi [2016] for sure.” The actress added, “She is a full crackpot. She is loud and she says whatever is on her mind, but in an endearing way. I think that’s one friend you have to have near you at your wedding. This has to be that one person who puts everything into perspective, and tells you things the way they are!” When I tell her that my pick would have been Ambalika (the army officer from Parmanu), she ponders over it seriously. “What would she do at a wedding, though? Hoist the flag? I suppose she can take care of security, I guess. No gate crashers at the buffet!” To this, I had to ask: Has she ever crashed a wedding for its buffet?

“I'm not telling you. It's possible. Maybe,” she says with a smile, before signing off.

Photographs by Taras Taraporvala; Fashion and creative direction by Gautam Kalra; Artist PR: Communique PR; Hair and makeup: Namrata Soni. Hair: Komal Vora; Assisted by: Ridhi Matreja; Styling team: Kaveri Sharma and Damini Sharma; Location courtesy: The Quorum, Mumbai; Bookings and production: Varun Shah.