Fair or Foul: Bride Demands $500 From Her Destination Wedding Guests

A destination wedding can be a costly affair, not just for the bride and groom but also for the guests. Aside from the cost of your wardrobe and jewellery, there are the flights and accommodations to think about. While most couples expect their guests to cover the cost of transportation, they usually help minimise costs by arranging accommodations, or at least a room block for hotel bookings, for their guests. In any case, it’s considered obvious that the bride and groom would inform the guests of the expectations while inviting them to a distant venue. That was not the case with this Reddit user, who took to the platform to share their experience with the Internet.

In a thread on the subreddit r/weddingshaming, the original poster (OP) explained that their cousin planned a destination wedding and told the guests that their accommodations were paid for, and everyone simply needed to pay for their transportation. Then, two months before the wedding, the bride demanded that each wedding guest send her $500 for their stay on the ‘large estate’ that the couple had booked for the big day.

While the fact that she demanded money for accommodations after claiming that it’s been taken care of is appalling, the OP also shared that the price she was demanding was much higher than what it should be.

 "I checked the website and the venue fee includes access to the entire grounds, and the number of guests I’ve been told are coming x $500 actually means she’ll be making more than what the venue fee is,” they wrote. They also revealed that the couple had set up a GoFundMe for their honeymoon and that they had set a goal for $10,000 for the post-wedding getaway.

When fellow Reddit users asked him to simply not go to the wedding, the OP clarified that they’re a part of the wedding party, so backing out is not an option. 

One Redditor noted in the thread that the demand seemed fishy from the beginning. “If it was just the accommodations you were paying for, you'd be paying the hotel directly," one user wrote. "She is literally planning a wedding to her standards, and then having her guests pay for it. That's sneaky, tacky, and cheap. It's not appropriate to put that kind of financial burden on your guests. I assume that gifts are expected on top of the cost of attending. Gross. Don't put yourself out financially for this person.”

Another, rightfully, said that when guests made plans to attend the wedding and booked their tickets, they were under the assumption that the accommodations would be taken care of by the bride, as she had claimed. Had they known that they would have to pay to stay, many would have opted out.

“I can’t imagine anyone attending a wedding where they have to pay to get in. That ain’t happening. If it was my niece, and I found out it was $500 to attend her wedding, I’d be like, ‘Sounds like a fancy place. Sorry I won’t be there.’ These brides get crazier and crazier every day.”

There were some who came up with creative responses that the OP can give to their cousin.

“This is where my petty kicks in. I'd 100% be booking a B&B or hotel room nearby. When bride pushes the $500, you simply say that you never agreed to that, that you wanted more privacy then the venue allowed and that you have booked a hotel room. The bride does not get to shake down her guests.”

Do you think it’s fair of the bride to ask her guests to pay to stay at the estate?